The part that really drove me crazy

So four months into my Hess experience I had fought my way into a decent schedule, my kindy class was great and my other two classes were going okay...
So why did I quit six months later?
Here's the part that really drove me crazy.

Picture all of us foreign teachers sitting around a table for our weekly meeting. Perhaps the Taiwanese management is there, perhaps they aren't. We discuss mundane little details and then...(hum Jaws song here) James opens his mouth:

"Well, there's something coming up and I think you guys will really enjoy it...."

AAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

"Next week the branch has got something planned, it should be really fun..."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

"So you all know that I was in Taipei yesterday at a big meeting for all foreign managers- it turns out that soon we'll be..."

NOOOOOOOONOOOOOOOOOOOONOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ANYTHING BUT THAT!!!!!!

"I think you'll be really excited for the next special event that's coming up..."

RUNAWAYRUNAWAYRUNAWAY RUNAWAYRUNAWAYRUNAWAYRUNAWAYRUNAWAYRUNAWAYRUNAWAY

It was true- my new schedule wasn't bad. But it seemed like every other week, my branch or Hess main office was introducing some new thing that we had to do. There were three levels of annoyances:

Level 1: We would have to somehow pack more knowledge into our kids heads, even though we already had a full curriculum to teach, and were already quizzing them and tutoring them during bathroom breaks and snack-times. This would take the form of special tests from Taipei that we had to do during classtime, or some new curriculum that we would somehow need to fit in. I say these are level 1 annoyances because they would take place primarily during classtime and we wouldn't have to put too much extra (unpaid) time into them. Level 1 annoyances could also take the form of one of the management needing to observe our class, either to evaluate our performance as a teacher, or to take pictures and videos for marketing, or so the sales department could figure out another way to sell the class to perspective students. As most teachers can attest, having an extra person in your classroom, especially if they are videotaping or snapping pictures, can be a huge distraction to your kids (not to mention making the teacher look bad).

Level 2: Some sort of event or training that took place during class, so you would miss your class and have to make it up later. There were 3, 6 and 9 month trainings in Taipei, along with 'quarterly trainings', and then there were other random trainings for specific classes or events that were coming up. Don't get me wrong, I think training is great and it's wonderful to have professional development. But taking a 45 minute bus ride then a 20 minute cab ride to Hess main office for a 2 hour training, then taking the cab and the bus back to your branch, missing 2 classes in the process and having to make those classes up during your free time on a Saturday or some other day? You do the math. It sucks. And these trainings were unpaid.

Level 3: These were the grand-daddies of annoying special events, and they came out at 3 out of every 4 weekly meetings. James was at his best when announcing these events.

"You know how everybody loves free food..?" he'd say, and we'd learn that there was a special promotional bar-b-q in front of the school on the following Saturday, from 9-11. Fine. Everyone does love free food and it's only 2 hours. But on Wednesday we'd find out that we needed to help set up for it. Make that 8-11. And could we stay a little late on Friday night to help make decorations? Sure. Add another unpaid hour, or two if you don't want to be an asshole who walks out while their exhausted co-teachers, who have toddlers at home, are still making more decorations. Oh by the way we'd really like it if you could plan a mini-lesson, to demonstrate your teaching skills. And it's really a little bit rude to walk out after it's all over without helping clean up a little bit.
Suddenly 'You know how everyone loves free food' means 'goodbye saturday'

Then there were 'open houses' in which the foreign teacher comes in on a Saturday or Sunday and 'tells a story' to perspective students. Of course telling a story suddenly becomes using huge story boards to tell a story, and of course you can't just read a book, and would you spend a couple of hours finding appropriate sound effects on the internet and burning them to a cd? And now you need to practice with your co-teacher about when to do which sound effects. And did we mention that you'll be performing acrobatic stunts in front of a huge audience and sweating like a pig? It will only be an hour, from 10 to 11am - but of course we'll yell at you for showing up at 10 because you're 'late' and it will start late and go long because there will be hoards of parents afterwards who want to practice their all but forgotten English on you. And yes we know that it's written into your contract that if you participate in one of these events, you get paid for 2 hours, but it was only 10-11, so we're only paying you for one hour...

Ya know what- there are four levels of special event annoyingness

Level 4: Performances. Shocking amounts of pressure all built up around what a four year old will do when on stage in front of 200 people. I don't even know how to talk about this yet. It needs its own post.

and then there are promotional things, not on the school property. I'll write about that in the next post.